To Be or not To Be

I may not be able to have all that I think I want to have, but I can be all that I think I want to be.

Let me explain what I mean here.

We catch a vision. It may be a dream. It may be a waking thought or fantasy. Regardless of how it comes, we envision something.

When this vision is compelling, we have a strong urge to act towards its accomplishment. Our action may result in realization of the dream, or it may take us in an entirely different direction.

If we become attached to the physical goals of the vision, we may judge our efforts as failed, when we do not manifest the objects we desire. We are not bound to make that choice, though.

Great joy may be experienced in the pursuit of dreams. Following a vision requires energy. Energy is what makes us feel alive. This energy-driven “being” is ours to claim any time we are expressing a passion for life.

Many artists never become financially successful because they are not able to cultivate a market for their product. These individuals may never realize their dream of selling enough of their art to reach physical goals. In many cases, their art becomes a hobby instead of their livelihood.

Is this tragic? Is it sad? It depends on the individual doesn’t it?

Personally, I would like to be able to write and be paid for my writing. I intend to find a way to do just that. Right now however, I have not found those markets, and my writing is a hobby.

Nonetheless, writing fills me with passion. I become ecstatic when I'm able to capture an experienced feeling, and believe I have found the words to convey this to another. I experience great joy, when someone confirms that what I have written spoke to their heart.

Whether I ever become a paid writer is less important to me than my need to be a writer. It is possible that I will never write a book that sells; that I will never be paid to write a column; or that no one would ever want to pay to read anything I write.

I may not achieve that part of my vision. But, nothing can stop me from “being” a writer.As long as I am fed by writing, I am a writer. If I experience my cup being filled to overflowing by capturing my thoughts and putting them on paper, I am “being” a writer.

The choice to “be” is mine and mine alone to make. There is nothing in the outer which can deny my choice to be whom and what I choose to be. If I choose to be more loving, the people in my circle of influence may respond with love or apathy. Their response has nothing to do with my choice to be.

So, I may or may not have the things I think I want in this life. Some of obtaining “things” is in my control and some is not. Nothing, however, can prevent me from “being” who I want to be. Only I have the power to become the being I choose to be or to settle for some alternative. No greater choice will I ever make.